Thursday, 21 April 2016

Depression Awareness Week

So this week is depression awareness week and I feel like I should mark the occasion here on my blog. So I thought I would talk about how depression feels to me and also some of the little things that help me out day to day life.

The campaign the Depression Alliance is using this year is don't keep depression under your hat (which is why you have a lovely picture of me in a hat)  and you can donate to the cause here.

How my Depression Feels

My depression can vary day to day, and I think that is something that people sometimes forget. I can generally manage my day to day life without having to spend hours crying into my pillow. In fact, sometimes I think if I could cry it would be a relief. Why? Because the worst part of depression for me is the empty feeling. There is no emotion sometimes, I just feel worthless and flat. Sometimes though when I do have a good old cry things feel a lot clearer and a lot better. 

Sometimes I could be walking down the road and suddenly this thought would pop into my head about if I fell in front of a bus it would all be over. Then as quickly as it comes it goes again and then I feel guilty when I think of all the people I love and who love me. 

Little Things That Help

Going out for a walk. This doesn't always help but now and again just getting out of my home environment and getting some fresh air does me the world of good.

A talk with Tom. I have noticed recently that I had stopped telling tom when I was feeling down. I think because I feel guilty for feeling down sometimes. Especially if we are having a good time, and I feel I have nothing to feel down about it and yet that sinking feeling just kicks in and feels like a huge weight. The old saying a problem shared is a problem halved really rings true here and I need to talk to him more.

Yoga. Either going to a class or doing yoga following youtube channels has really helped lately as it takes my focus completely to my breath and my body. I turn my focus to each muscle and force myself to think about anything other than my feelings. 

Eating well. Since going back to slimming world a week ago and cutting down on the amount of fat I am eating and sugar I have been feeling a lot better (even despite being physically poorly this week with my chronic health conditions)

What I want you to know

That no matter how bad you feel you are never alone. I would always reccomend talking to someone, whoever that is. The Samaritans are a fantastic charity that helped me out a number of times when I was at university and at 3am couldnt sleep for worry.

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